Keeping my mouth shut

I still can not fully post about the situation that's been going on however there a light at the end of a tunnel.  There are days I feel like I do nothing but slam my head against a brick wall and other times I feel like there could be an ounce of progress made.  Oh well the entire process is coming to an end and I will finally be able to walk away.  I will remain the person I aways was.  My opinions have not changed, my views have not changed and definately my theories have not changed.

A full week update

I took some time away from postsing last week.  I didn't want to put up something that I could later possibly regret.  I am still not ready to post what's truly bothering me, but it's kinda like the huge elephant in the room that no one wants to talk about.

I have been crafting in the afternoons and evenings and that brings me calm and peace.  Cross stitch is slow and steady.  The Eeyore pillowcase is taking quite a long time but progress is steady.

Today I started a crocheted blanket for someone.  I am using a 'manly' camoflague yarn that I found yesterday, yes a purchase but with my current mood I felt the need to buy a few small things.  4 skiens of yarn was part of that purchase.  Today I was a crocheting fool, 2 skiens are done and the blanket looks great.  I am sticking to my standard pattern of a huge granny square.  I want to focus on this project and finish it up early this week. (Monday or Tuesday). 

My son wants me to purchase a sewing maching with some of my IRS Refund money.  I don't know how to sew or what I would sew.  Do I really need a sewing maching at this point in my life?  I am pretty happy with cross stitch and crochet.  A sewing maching would mean I need a table to work on (another purchase) plus then all that fabric....  If you could see my yarn stash, you would understand why I dont want to get started with fabric.

I am well into student teaching and passed the half way mark last week.  I think both myself and my mentor teacher will be thrilled when this experience is over. (this is the elephant in the room).   This week is AIMS testing  (T/W) so it is an easy week and my wonderful (snicker) mentor teacher had me schedule a test for Friday.  No comment.  I am simply doing my 60 days....April 9th here I come.

I hope this week goes well, that I remain calm and hey, that my crafting turns out well... this is about crafting and my happiness..

J is doing excellent on his JHU math class.  At this rate he should be done sometime this week or next week and ready for the test.  A 3 month class he completed in under a month.

I am also applying at ASU for him for the Spring Session again.  I better remember to do those forms tomorrow...

Cranky I guess

I guess I am cranky.... What can I say...
I had a good day, I accomplished most everything on my list but something has been bothering me for a while.  I'm not ready to post about it yet... but I do need to make a significant change in my life soon.  Hopefully my mental and physical outlook will be better....

On the crafting side I finished a washcloth/hotpad via crochet and its cute.  I did a few row of cross stitch on the pillowcase.

I took some of J's old clothes to the kiddie resale shoppe and got enough funds to cover my splurge at the craft store on cross stitch string and a new storage container.  I mailed my mothers completed table runner (5 wks late).  A few other errands and I started to clean my room and closet.  Its a way way long way from done but I feel good about the small bit that I got accomplished today.

Tomorrow is back to student teaching and I hope my cranky mood disappears overnight.

Weekend Bliss

I can say that I had a good weekend.  I accomplished things and there is still tomorrow. (Monday is a Federal Holiday so no school). 

Saturday: I took a box of books to Half Price Books and in return received enough money for 4 new books.  Decluttering and new reading material is always great!.  (I also had a bag of misc. donations and dropped those off)  I went to Hobby Lobby and wandered around, found some not so needed thread for cross stitch but hey, one can never have too much thread.  I took Joey to dinner then to Toys R Us.  I also filed my TAXES last night.  That was a very good use of about 45 minutes.  I hope my refund comes soon.

Sunday: I dropped of my car for an oil change and tire rotation.  While that was going on I went to lunch and the grocery store.  Joey and I cleaned out his closet so tomorrow I will take his outgrown clothes to the kiddie resale shoppe and get a few dollars (if I am lucky).  I worked on my cross stitch project and that was the extent of today.

Joey is doing well with his on line math class and seems to be moving right along.  What I dont love about the program is there is no gauge to tell you how much progress you have made or how much you have left. 

Tomorrow I want to get some time in to cross stitch.  That just feels like 'my time' right now.  Peaceful and quiet.  I need to concentrate and focus.  I don't know how else to explain it.

What I am NOT looking forward to is my 4 days of teaching.  I am really trying to be at peace with my assigned teacher but its not working.  I even reached out to the English teacher across the hall on Friday for guidance and advice.  While she understands where I am coming from, 'Renee is Renee' and its difficult to change that.  I do feel better that others see things as I do.  If nothing else this entire experience is excellent in showing me how not to do things.  I just wish the classroom was not so tense.

And yes it is Valentines Day, a day that  I do not celebrate for many many reasons.   Today was February 14th, I did get Joey a card, some candy and a small lego set....  He was happy because it was the first NASCAR race of the season and the show 'The Amazing Race' also started this evening.

Talk about a crappy afternoon

This student teaching just sucks.  I'm sorry but the teacher I am paired up with is no help, support or anything.  She loves to tear me down and make me feel like shit.  For example today I was doing powerpoint presentations from the textbook.  Granted the session consisted mainly of vocab words and was a bit 'dry' however the lesson was about 20 mins long if *IF* the class was with me.  Well since these are the classes from hell, behavior issues, no rules, free time etc very few kids were following along etc.  I'm sorry but this is a high school class, I'm not going to baby the students.  I keep moving along, if they choose to stay with me great, if not, to bad.

The only feedback I every recieve from my 'master teacher' is to "control the class" and I need to "get their attention".  Ya thats helpful.  So I guess she has decided that after this chapter SHE is going to resume teaching and at some point in the future we will re-evalute my 'abilities'.  Oh this is just going to be soooo wonderful...

No wonder kids are screwed up.  No one holds them accountable, no one makes them do anything and heck heaven forbid the actual teacher does anywork.   Her favorite phrase to me is 'I'm just too busy to teach'.  Lovely, just lovely.

Just another day....

Really, today was Tuesday and it was 'just another day'.  J is loving his online math class.  He worked for almost an hour once we got home this afternoon.  His scores are holding over 95% and they are 'low' because both of us are still a bit unfamiliar with how the system fully operates.

I started a new cross-stitch this afternoon.  Surprisingly the sewing was quite relaxing today.  Eeyore is going to take me some time on the pillowcase but the colors I have selected are pretty.  I should have the 1st cloud done tomorrow. Maybe I will do the flowers next then move back to the last cloud.  Such decisions I face.

I need to remember to print forms for J and his new session at ASU.  He is eligible to apply for the spring session and there is a science class he wants to take. 

I don't know what tomorrow holds but I am hoping for the best!

Cross-stitch Success

My cross-stitch project is complete. The last stitches were put in this evening around 830pm.  The sense of accomplishment were great.  Then I promptly went to my container of crafty items and selected my next victim.  Eeyore pillow cases - yes 2 of the same thing, much like the table runner which has the same design on both ends.  Tomorrow afternoon I will break open the packaging and select string from my stash and start sewing up a storm.  Or maybe I will spend a day or 2 crocheting the yellow and purple blanket.  Either way progress is being made and I am happy.  I must say the table runner is cute and my mother should be happy.

J started his on-line math class today and worked for 90 mins. He loves it, what can I say?  So far he is at 98% and just blowing over lessons like nothing.  I can hardly wait to see what happens tomorrow.  At this speed he will complete the entire class in less than 12 weeks.  That is fine, he can register for a 2nd class if there are more then 2 weeks left.  GO J GO.

I am starting to get organized with paperwork and such. I found some plastic page protectors and new binders and was working on that for a bit tonight as well.  J has his papers in order from ASU and JHU.  I feel his things should be kept neat and orderly incase I need to refer to them for scholarships and references etc.  Maybe later this week I can get my things in order as well.  I sure hope so.  Sometimes my room looks like an office supply store exploded in here LOL.

But the huge news I needed to post about was the completition of the cross stitch.

Good Night